Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Blind Date Basics

When someone sets you up with a person on a blind date, it says a lot about what they think of you. Of course, there are many different factors to consider. One is how well the person setting you up knows you. Another is how motivated they are to set you up. A third is how many people they know. When my grandma calls me saying she has met a single girl, you can rest assured that this single girl a) comes from a really great family capable of paying for a really nice wedding reception, and b) she is single. My grandma has no concept of attractiveness or personality compatibility. If the girl wears really nice shoes, my grandma will usually throw in these piece of information as well.

This isn't to say my grandma has never tried to set me up with an attractive girl. She did once. My grandma is just going to look for different qualities in a mate for me than I might look for. It's the same thing with siblings and friends. A person with the best intentions for setting me up may still totally fail at it because they don't know any girls that I would be attracted to.

Still, I can't help but feel disappointed when I meet a girl on a blind date that someone chose for me and the girl isn't attractive. Especially when the person setting me up knows me well. What were the criteria they used to determine this set up? ("Well, they are both single and Tripp is a boy and she is a girl so... BINGO!") I have been set up with girls much older than me, girls taller than me and girls much heavier than me. Most setups just don't make sense on paper, let alone in the real world. So, when someone who knows lots of single girls sets me up with an overweight unattractive shy girl, I know that either this person a) does not think very highly of me, b) thinks very highly of this girl or c) is a lunatic.

I understand that there is a very wide range of subjectivity in attractiveness, humor, ideal weight, and personality connection. But I don't think it is too hard to figure out where my subjective levels of what is acceptable are. And a setup with a girl that is outside of those acceptable ranges is really just a waste of time for both of us.

Monday, March 29, 2010

What's all this talk about love?

Friday night I went with Chief to play video games with this girl Gamer and her friend. Chief and I picked up pizza on the way over. Gamer is a very different girl. She plays lots of video games. For some reason, I am very attracted to her though. Maybe it's just because she seems so relaxed compared to other girls. Like she isn't trying to be anything other than herself. Gamer has a yappy little dog that seriously drove me bonkers though. We played Super Mario Brothers on her Wii until like 1:30 in the morning. It was a lot of fun.

On Saturday, I had a date with BFD. I was supposed to go to a wedding reception before the date but I hurt my back really bad and had to lay down for a bit. I woke up 10 minutes late to my date and impossibly late to the wedding reception. I think I showed up at BFD's place 30 minutes late. We met up with BFD's roommate Script and this guy she is kinda dating. After dinner, we decided to rent a movie. The guy Script was on a date with chose this movie Black Dynamite. I kissed BFD a couple of times and then headed home.

On Sunday, BFD texted me asking me to come over and hang out. I was bored since all of my roommates have basically abandoned me so I headed over. We watched slumdog millionaire. I think BFD honestly likes me but it feels so contrived. Like that maybe BFD just likes the idea of me. Script was saying how she wanted a guy that had such and such qualities and I realized that she was kinda naming off all the qualities that I had. Not trying to build up my ego or anything. I just wondered if maybe BFD was feeling pressure from her friends to settle down with a guy and if maybe the qualities her friends wanted had influenced the qualities that BFD wanted. Do you think maybe I am purposefully not falling for BFD because she represents all the girls that I have wanted to date in the past who wanted guys other than me?

Friday, March 26, 2010

Suggestions to improve the mormon dating scene

So the weekend is approaching and I haven't done anything to "drop" BFD or Pulse. Pulse is out of town this weekend visiting her sister who is an actress in this HBO series. BFD texted me the other night suggesting we do something this weekend. I decided to give it one more serious chance with her so we are going out on Saturday. Tonight, my buddy Chief and I are going to play video games with some girls. Chief was one of my good friends in undergrad. I was the best man at his wedding. Chief''s wife MrsChief and I are good friends too. I have to admit though, I really don't understand their relationship. Chief is going to some girl's house to play video games on a friday night without MrsChief. Two girls, two boys, double date right? Anyway, I think he wants to sort of set me up with one of the girls that works with him.

A week or so ago, I started messaging Spinster on Facebook. As you might remember, Spinster and I had a decent first date back in January and then Spinster got a boyfriend while I was on my cruise. I was basically just fishing. She responded back and forth several times and I finally felt comfortable enough to ask when we might go on our second date. She told me she and this guy had just broken up and that we ought to. So, we have plans for next Friday. Spinster is doing her student teaching right now and she is a physical trainer at a gym - both definite plusses. However, Spinster is also very attractive and gets asked out quite regularly.

I have been thinking about how to change the mormon dating scene. Here are a few off the cuff suggestions.

1. No more limits on who you can date. If a girl has dated my best friend or met my best friend at a party or whatever, this should not preclude me from dating her. I don't care if my best friend liked her or still likes her. People should not be that territorial. Potential advantages: Opens up dating a lot more. You tend to meet the people your friends date so why not be able to date those people? Potential disadvantages: Guys at the top of their game will poach more. This rule tends to benefit those guys and girls more that are higher up on the mormon dating food chain.

2. A small get together social network. Instead of paying for a dating service, how about paying for a small-get together service. It basically takes two groups of friends and matches them up for an evening hang out. I think something like this would help us actually meet people. You and your friends commit to these hang outs for two hours. It matches groups together and facilitates actually meeting peole. Kinda like speed dating for hang outs. Potential advantages: Meet lots more people. Easier to get a number in a hang out environment than in a dark dance club. Potential disadvantages: Could become a feeding ground for NCMO. Also, it might be kinda like family home evening: only the people who need help dating actually go. Thus, it might be overrun with less attractive guys and girls.

3. A free online dating service. Facebook is free. Why can't there be a dating service that is free? How about a simple facebook application for this? It only attempts to match you with people who meet your basic requirements. Potential advantages: Easier to meet people. Less likely to spend many hours writing messages to people who aren't paying for the service and can't read your messages. Potential disadvantages: People naturally take better care of things that they pay for. If they aren't paying, they may not be as dedicated to it.

More to come (potentially).

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Fatal flaws of mormon dating

I agree with everyone's comments that I need to just move on. I have felt strongly about a girl/girls in the past and I hope that someday I can feel that way again. There isn't a lot of point in dating a girl that I am not falling head over heels for (other than making my mom and dad very happy).

When I was in college (back in my younger days...), if a weekend came up where I didn't have a date, I could just go to some party with a group of friends and walk away with a date for the following weekend. Those days are gone. I still have single friends and they still go to those parties. I even attend with them occasionally. But, I almost never leave having met a single girl with any real prospect. There are several reasons.

1. The mormon aristocracy. I talked about these people in a previous post. The mormon aristocracy dominates these parties. It's the same elitists at basically every party. Or at least a very large group of them. They all know each other. The guys in the mormon aristocracy are usually tools. Some may be nice guys but I would guess most of them are stringing along four or five girls. Likewise, the girls in the mormon aristrocracy are stringing along four or five guys. What you end up with is this giant web of self loving elitists. To break a girl away from that web, you have to convince her you are better than the four or five guys she is stringing along and the one guy that is stringing her along.

2. Molds. A girl already has plenty of friends that are guys. She has been used by plenty of tools. If she is 18, 19 or 20, she may not be looking for a serious relationship. If she is 21 or older, she has developed a mold. This mold is what she expects her boyfriend/husband to fit into. Who knows what is in this mold? They don't broadcast it. I am not even sure if a single guy at the parties fits into the mold. They want rich and tall and dark and handsome and foreign and loving and independent and caring and studly and able to do double back flips off of diving boards and have the ability to woo every girl in the room but somehow choose them. TheFlake is a perfect example of a girl with a mold.

3. Defenses. When I do meet a girl at one of these parties, she already has her guard up. Every guy there is a tool until proven otherwise and I have zero opportunity to prove otherwise. Lets say that I start a conversation with a girl. In my experience, I have two minutes. During those two minutes, I have to prove that a) I am interesting, b) that I am funny, c) that I am competent, d) that I am not a tool, e) that I am interested, and f) that I am attractive enough to warrant a date. It is basically impossible. "Oh Tripp," you say, "why can't you just ask them for their phone number and prove it on a date?" Good question. It's because these girls don't give out their number to guys they aren't interested in. If you ask too soon, then you are a creeper. If you somehow manage to get enough points to justify them giving you their number (I imagine that for guys that are much better looking than me, this is easier), you have to KNOW when you have reached this threshold and act on it before your two minutes are up. Once the two minutes are up, and two minutes is only an estimate, you have lost your chance. You are either interrupted by a guy that knows her and is more than willing to cock block you or the girl walks away from the conversation.

So, here is my frustration. I can't meet girls. I go on plenty of dates but many (if not most) are with girls I am not interested in. A lot are set ups. I almost never am interested in the girls that people are offering to set me up with. Sure I can give them a chance but statistically, I am not going to meet someone I am interested in on a blind date.

I have tried other methods of meeting girls. I have been to mormon dances. It's a wasteland. There are two kinds of girls that go to dances. 1. Girls who like to dance and are emotionally unavailable. 2. Girls who are looking for a man. Girls who are looking for a man like that are not the girls that I want to go out with. The girls who like to dance have no interest in a relationship. Most are too young for me to date anyway. I have tried meeting girls at church. The singles wards are full of girls right? Wrong. The singles wards are full of young girls who aren't even thinking about marriage and non-attractive girls. The whole mormon dating system is fatally flawed.

Monday, March 22, 2010

I know you're out there somewhere

BFD had a friend that needed a date on Friday so I brought along Milo. Having her friend and my friend there only seemed to amplify the awkward that is BFD. Milo was explaining some things about his ethnic origin and I could just see BFD's eyes glaze over. I don't know if it was too intellectually challenging for her or if she really just didn't care about some central European country and the politics there. I was annoyed that she wouldn't give my friend more respect.

After dinner, we went and saw that new Gerard Butler/Jennifer Aniston movie "The Bounty Hunter." Do not go see this movie. Ok, the movie wasn't bad. It just wasn't at all good. I think BFD liked it. The concept of the movie is just dumb. And somehow they expect us to believe that these people ever were in love or ever could be in love again.

I didn't hold hands with BFD or kiss her. In fact, she put on lip gloss while I was still finishing my dinner AND on the drive back to her house. It's not just that BFD doesn't have some of the things that I think are really important, she hardly has any of the things that I think are important.

On Saturday, I went on a date with Pulse. We were cuddling at her apartment near the end of the date. I came to the full blown realization then that I really have almost no feelings for Pulse. I care for her as a friend but the romantic interest simply is not there. I felt so dishonest for taking her on dates and stuff when I just wasn't interested.

So now I find myself at a crossroads. Should I keep going out with either Pulse or BFD to see if feelings develop? Or should I stop asking either of them out and wait for the next wave of girls that may or may not come?

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Kissing or Memories with ManHands

I get a lot of pressure from a lot of different sources about kissing. My friends are always asking "so did you kiss her?" or "did you get some?" after I go on a date. Some of my coworkers want details. When explaining dates to people, one of the main topics is whether I kissed her or not and why. I think a lot of guys like to pretend that they are doing a lot more kissing with a lot more girls than they really are. For instance, most of my friends have not kissed that many girls. Littlebrother has probably kissed more girls than any of my other friends. Most people that I meet have kissed less than 10 people in their life.

Nevertheless, I feel pressure to kiss girls. I know that I kiss too many girls. Crap, I kiss girls that I don't like. I kiss girls that I kind of like. Rarely do I kiss girls that I like. A few years ago (more or less), my sister set me up with this girl Welder. Welder was my sister's college roommate. We went on a date and seemed to click. We ended up on a blanket in the park with me playing guitar for her. I decided to kiss her. Now, here's the weird part. After I kissed her, we got kicked out of the park cause it was after hours. We were walking back to my car and started holding hands. Welder had man hands! They weren't huge or anything. They were probably about the same size as my hands but it totally threw me off. How could I be kissing some girl when holding her hand freaked me out?

Welder and I ended up hooking up a couple more times after that but I never got over the hands thing. If I had held her hand prior to kissing her, I probably wouldn't have kissed her. So I am sure you are asking the same question that I am asking. Why do I keep making the same mistakes over and over again? I think I am just hoping that I will feel more of a connection with a girl if I kiss her. I watch too many movies.

Monday, March 15, 2010

The Next Round

So I went on my third date with BFD on Friday night. Sometimes it is just so awkward being around her. I am starting to wonder if maybe she isn't trying to make things awkward. Maybe she really is that awkward. I think the conversation with BFD is lacking a good percentage of the time. I just don't know what to talk about with her.

After seeing the comedian, we went to this dessert place that I really like and then watched "Can't Hardly Wait" at my house. In case you didn't know, I derived the name Tripp Hazard partially from this movie. There is a scene where Tripp McNeely (Jerry O'Connell) comes over to the high school party. He graduated a year ago. He was the big man on campus in high school and he "can't even get digits as a freshman." He talks about how he tried to get back with his high school girlfriend but "she was all comfortable with some senior. He's a pre-med... they're all pre-meds." When I first saw this movie, I felt like Tripp McNeely and I had the same problem but on opposite spectrums. He was on one side (the former high school jock) looking across at the smart guys thinking they were getting all the girls and I was on the other side (the former high school nerd) looking across at all the athletes thinking they were getting all the girls. It just clicked for me.

I ended up kissing BFD on the couch while watching the movie. Tripp McNeely would have been so proud. Me? Not so much. I really don't think I could marry BFD. It would just be too much of a compromise. Still, kissing BFD was pretty nice. She is decent kisser (she ought to be with all her experience). I am not ready to throw in the towel with her yet but I am not super excited about it either.

On Saturday, Charlie sent me a text canceling cause her babysitter couldn't come and she needed to show her house to a buyer. To be honest, I was a little relieved. I was kinda dreading a third date with Charlie. Our phone conversation had been so lacking that I wasn't sure I could handle all the work it would take to go on a full date with her. I texted back saying it was no big deal. I think we can safely say that I won't be asking Charlie out on any more dates.

On Sunday, Pulse came over to watch a movie. The conversation with Pulse is almost never lacking. We just click. The more time I spend with her, the more I like her even though we hardly see eye to eye on anything. Pulse is pretty cool though.

Today while eating lunch, I ran into Sidehug. I went on a few dates with Sidehug but she was kinda awkward and at the end of one of the dates, she gave me a side hug which sorta made me think she had zero interest. Sidehug has put on a little weight but she still looked pretty good. I think maybe I will try and ask her out. I sent her a message on the facebook today.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Third dates for everyone!

My date with BFD was pretty fun. I decided to hold her hand during the movie. Can I just say that watching a 3D movie is absolute awfulness. Please remind me in the future any time I think "I should watch a movie in 3D." My love of movies ends where 3D movies begin.

We grabbed dinner after the movie and had an interesting chat. The topic of kissing came up. BFD told me she was a lip slut. Then she told me that I should guess how many boys she had kissed. I guessed 74. I was way low. She said she has kissed approximately 290 different boys. 290!!! I laughed so hard. I was only off by about 220 in my guessing. There were a couple of awkward moments at dinner. Sometimes I just don't know what to talk about with BFD. The conversation doesn't always just flow. Some of the time I think she is just trying to be awkward but some of the time, I think she really is just awkward. Maybe so many guys have kissed her because the conversation got awkward and they decided they would get rid of the awkardness by kissing. I know I have done that in the past.

I asked BFD to go see a comedian with me for this Friday. It should be fun but if some of the awkwardness doesn't wear off, I am not sure how many dates I can go on with her. After dinner, we were walking and BFD kissed me on the cheek. Before my mission, I went out on a few dates with a girl we'll call Jonesy. I really liked Jonesy. After seeing a movie, I walked her to her door. She said how much fun she had and then kissed me on the cheek. I had made out with several girls before that but nothing compared to the euphoria I experienced from that kiss on the cheek. I drove home in a haze. I am not sure I could have passed a sobriety test because I was drunk from that kiss. Nothing ever happened with Jonesy. She made it almost impossible to go on another date until a few weeks before my mission, when she told me she just wasn't looking for a relationship.

BFD's kiss didn't send me into a state of Euphoria. I could have kissed BFD for sure but I didn't. I am not even sure I want to. Five years ago, I would have just made out with BFD and never called her again. But now, with everyone telling me to keep dating girls that I don't immediately click with, I am going on a third date with her. It just doesn't feel like progress.

Last night I randomly decided to call Charlie. Talk about another awkward conversation. Charlie is a total talker and yet our phone call felt like I was running uphill in the snow where your feet sink in with every step. I really don't feel like I have anything in common with Charlie. I tried so hard to find some common ground last night. Still, in my new resolution to step it up and go out with girls I don't like, I asked Charlie out for a third date. I am not particularly looking forward to it. So, Friday, third date with BFD. Saturday, third date with Charlie.

I talked to Pulse a bit yesterday. I have to admit that my interest in Pulse has waned a little more. I never felt super interested in her. I definitely like spending time with her but I am not at all driven to enter a relationship with her. It is yet to be determined when we will next hang out. I chatted with FormerLesbian the other day. She seemed pretty down on herself. I felt really bad. I think she really just needs some good friends. We agreed to watch a movie sometime and eat girl scout cookies.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Gorillas and swag

On Saturday, Pulse and I made out. It was a pretty good make out. We had just finished watching the crappy movie that we rented. Then, last night at a ward activity, I saw her there. It wasn't awkward or anything, I just didn't run up to her and start holding her hand in front of everyone. Today, I received a facebook message from her saying that she is not going to kiss me anymore until/unless we are in an established relationship. Basically, she likes me but thinks that neither of us know if we like each other enough yet to justify kissing. I really don't know how to respond to that. Should I tell her that I won't go out with her anymore unless she agrees to let the kissing continue? Should I consider her defensive stance a preemptive strike and respond accordingly by discontinuing to date her? I like Pulse but I am nowhere near entering a committed relationship with her.

Other notes: I have a date tonight with BFD. It should be interesting. We are just going to see Alice in Wonderland. I don't intend to do anything after that. I don't plan on kissing her or holding her hand during the movie but she is a bit more aggressive than I am used to. Last night I met a girl named Nascar that I would totally like to take out. She is older than me but seems way fun. I was with Cowboy, Sugarloaf and Tweak when I met her. I think Cowboy had some interest in her too though. Cowboy is sort of like lil'wayne. He just exudes swag. Girls love swag. The thing about swag is that you can't fake it. You either have it or you don't. It's like walking into a gorilla cage. If the gorilla can sense even the tiniest weakness or fear in you, it is gonna tear your head off. Girls are the same way. They can sense a fake swag and they will react violently to it.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Big Freaking Deal

On Thursday, I had my first date with BFD. It was really fun. BFD is kinda goofy. There were a couple times during the date where I really wondered if she was just messing with me by trying to be weird. Littlebrother and RunsWithScissors both think that me dating a goofy girl just makes more sense. I wonder if I should take that as an insult...

After dinner, BFD and I went to my house and played some Super Nintendo. Then we kinda cuddled on the couch and watched an episode of Big Love. At one point, we held hands but it was super awkward cause BFD initiated it and I wasn't sure if we were really holding hands or just trying to be funny. On the date, BFD said something about kissing on first dates. The way she said it implied that she wanted me to kiss her that night. I think the word to describe BFD is quirky. On the drive after dinner, she pulled out a little flosser thing and flossed her teeth. She initiated a "thumb war" after awkwardly holding my hand for a minute. I think I could have kissed her at the end of the date but I wasn't ready for that yet. Plus, she had put on lip junk earlier on in the date and I wasn't sure if it had been sufficiently removed at that point. Still, it was a good date.

On friday, BFF, our good friend TheCWord and I went to dinner. It was fun. We played rockband after. I used to have a crush on TheCWord like 4 years ago.

On saturday, I picked up pizza and a movie with Pulse. It was almost impossible for Pulse and I to select a movie that we both wanted to watch. As I have said before, Pulse and I basically come from completely different worlds. Still, it was fun to hang out with her.

On sunday, I went to a new ward. I refer to this ward as the singles graveyard. Thing is, the ward I have been going to has tons of attractive girls but I hardly seem to meet any people there. Part of the problem is the size; the ward had several hundred people. Another problem is that a lot of the kids live at home so they aren't really driven to meet people at church. They live around all their friends from high school. In fact, a lot of their old friends from high school go to the same ward. I am so tired of it. I feel like I have to run twice as fast as everyone else to just compete. I met a couple of cool girls in the singles graveyard on my first day. I really shouldn't base my decision for what ward to attend on the number of attractive single girls in the ward. So this new ward might be really good for me.

This week, I am going to see Alice in Wonderland with BFD tomorrow night. I have tickets to a comedy show this weekend. I will see how my date with BFD goes tomorrow night before choosing who to ask.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

BFD

I have a first date in 1 hour and 20 minutes with BFD. In case you forgot (or didn't read back then), I met BFD last summer while shopping for furniture at the place where she works. It was a little awkward because she initiated giving me her cell phone number in what appeared to be a strictly business relationship. She wanted me to come back in and look at more furniture. In the end, the place where BFD worked was very overpriced so I decided to purchase from someone else.

I tried to call BFD a couple of times but she was a bit flaky. So when I received a text from her two days ago, I was kind of surprised. We texted back and forth and she definitely acted like she wanted me to ask her out so I did. I am just planning on going to dinner. I am a little worried that BFD thinks she is a big deal. TheCaptain knows her and says that she acted that way in college (interestingly enough, when BFD found out I knew TheCaptain, she exclaimed "You know TheCaptain? I love him!"). Even if the date doesn't go well, it should be interesting.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

The first time I just knew (part 3)

I was devastated. How could I have let the most important thing in my life slip right through my fingers? I couldn't focus on anything. I seriously was crying every night. I missed Lilo so much and I didn't understand why she wouldn't want to be with me. Nevertheless, life moved on. Two weeks later, I took the LSAT. I remember the day distinctly. I kicked some serious trash on that test and then went home, crawled into my bed, and cried myself to sleep. I didn't want to go to law school. I didn't want to go to normal school. I just wanted Lilo back.

On Christmas day, Lilo called me. To be honest, Christmas was the first day I had really felt ok since our breakup. It was almost as if Lilo could sense that I was finally starting to heal and she found this unacceptable. A few days later, she called me late one evening after she had been on a date and asked if she could come over. I accepted. She talked about how the date was not fun and how the entire time she had wished that she was there with me instead of him. We ended up making out that night. A few days later, she asked me to stop by her apartment and visit her. We made out again. Then, about a day or two later, she told me that the make outs had meant nothing to her - she was just proving to herself that she was over me. It was so cruel. It was like she had somehow figured out a way to break my heart again.

Somehow, Lilo continued to keep her claws in my life over the next few months. We hung out occasionally or talked on the phone. We didn't hook up any more but she was always reminding me that she was there and that I had to deal with life without her. That summer, I started dating Princess. Princess was this accomplished and classy girl. My friends said she was a babe. Littlebrother said she was better looking than what you would expect for me. One night (and I am not proud of this) soon after Princess and I went on our first date, Lilo came over and we ended up making out. While we were making out, Lilo looked up at me, smiled, and said "I love you."

I felt guilty. I had been kissing Princess. I liked Princess quite a bit. I told Lilo that I was dating Princess. I know it probably hurt Lilo's feelings but what was I supposed to do? I never told Princess about it. I never felt the same connection with Princess that I felt with Lilo. However, dating Princess made so much more sense. She was much more intelligent than Lilo. I didn't feel the instant connection with Princess; it developed slowly over time.

About six weeks after Princess and I started dating, I was still unsure of whether I wanted to enter a serious relationship with her. I had my doubts. One night, we were hanging out and Princess informed me that her ex was coming into town the upcoming weekend and that she would be going on a date with him. I was surprised and unprepared. She told me that we hadn't defined our relationship and therefore, it was perfectly ok for her to go out with this guy. I asked her if she planned to kiss him and she said yes. I was devastated.

I was driving a truck interstate at the time and was going to be out of town for about a week. I spent every second of that trip thinking about Princess and this guy being together. Princess and I planned a date for that Saturday night. I called her and received no answer. The time for our date came and went with no response. I stressed out major. I decided to write her a letter explaining to her how much she meant to me. I dropped it off at her house with her little sister.

The next night, I still hadn't heard anything from Princess. She called me around 9 and said she was coming over to see me. At this point, I was extremely anxious about what Princess had to say to me. She told me that she loved the letter and that it was perfect. It meant a lot to me. She said she wasn't ready to date me exclusively but wanted to continue to spend time with me. I vowed to not let Princess slip through my fingers the way that Lilo had.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Avatar in 3D or dinner with a former NBA player

On Saturday, Pulse and I went to see Avatar. It was the 3D version. Pulse definitely looked better on Saturday than she had on other days. After the movie, Pulse and I went to this local brewery to get some pizza. At times, the conversation was a little awkward. Pulse is a bit of a tree hugger. She is a vegetarian. She works for a non profit organization. She has a very idealistic view of the world. I am not quite so idealistic. I am more of a realist. I think that saving the environment is great but most of the efforts are misguided and unrealistic. Anyway, I worry about choosing my words around Pulse because she might get offended or become defensive. But our discussion over dinner went really well. Obviously, we disagree about nearly everything but I decided to not worry about it as much.

After filling my belly with pizza, I was feeling pretty good. It seemed a shame to just let the night end there. So Pulse came over to my house and I broke out the old super nintendo. We played one of my absolute most favorite games: Tetris 2. When I lived alone, I used to play this game for hours at a time because I didn't have cable tv or internet access. I was on level 10 and Pulse was on level 2 and I consistently beat her. But when she went to level 1, she managed to pull off a couple of nice wins. It was really fun. Too often, I think we have our guard up on dates. We go through the motions of dinner and a movie and a doorstep scene and those interactions typically lead to me liking a girl less, not more. However, playing Tetris 2 with Pulse made me see her competitive side. It definitely made me like her more.

Pulse and I then cuddled on the couch. I hadn't planned on making out with Pulse. It just happened. But I didn't feel guilty like I did with TheWriter. With TheWriter, I think I had already made up my mind about her before we made out. With Pulse, I haven't made up my mind yet. It was fun. And it didn't feel super awkward afterward.

Yesterday BFF and I went to her dad's house for dinner. Her dad was trying to set her up with a former NBA basketball player that lived in his stake. It was lots of fun. The former NBA'er was really cool. Some of my old friends from law school were there. I felt particularly confident and witty. I am thinking the NBA'er might ask BFF out on a date. That would be so awesome.