Thursday, July 30, 2009

No one

Ariel texted me last night. She wanted me to come study with her. At first, I thought to myself "why would I want to do that?" but then I thought that maybe she really does enjoy my company and maybe she really did get scared. I decided to play it off to see if I could gain any advantage from it. I told her I felt like she was just trying to get me to come over so that we could hook up. She responded with "So what if I am?" I then told her I was ok with hooking up with her as long as I didn't feel objectified. She said "Deal." I then said that I would come over to help her study as long as the odds of us making out were better than 50-50. To which she replied "OK."

Well, at that point, I had roped myself in. You can't say something like that to a girl and then decide to not go over. So I went over. She was looking extremely attractive. She had her glasses on, looking like a high school teacher or something. Fancy painted toenails. The song lyrics "I got a feeling, tonight's gonna be a good night" were echoing in my head. We studied until about 12:30 and then decided we were done. We both closed our laptops and sat on the floor of her bedroom. My opportunity had presented itself.

So what happened? Nothing! I didn't want to move over next to her and just move in for the kill. I kinda thought that maybe it was her move to make. And she just sort of stayed there. All of this happened in a matter of about 1 minute. I got up grabbed my stuff and walked out. She came out on the front porch with me and we had a long tight hug. I think she would have still kissed me then but I just walked away. Maybe I am playing games with her, maybe not. But no kissing with Ariel last night.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

It MUST be the FuManchu

Lots to discuss.

Ariel texted me last week. She wanted to study together. I am kind of a pushover. But I told her that I was going running that night but that I would study with her if she came over and went running with me. We ran about 4 miles and then studied for about an hour and a half together. I haven't heard from her since. Maybe I wore her out. Emotionally, I am done with her though.

Last Friday, I went on a date with Daisy (from Lady and the Tramp - not a Disney Princess but you try finding a Disney Princess with a 'D' name). We went to the rodeo up in Ogden. Daisy is tall, 6 feet. We actually got along really well. I think she is fairly intelligent and easy to talk to. I haven't called her yet but I think there may be some possibilities there.

On Saturday, I had a first date with Esmerelda. It was to the Demolition Derby. It is my favorite event of the whole year. I am like a kid waiting for the new Harry Potter movie or something. I got all dressed up in my demolition derby attire (cowboy boots, tight pants, wife beater, fake tattoos, old scout baseball cap). Esmerelda took it pretty well. She wasn't really dressed up at all but she put up with my garbage. My mom didn't take it as well. She sent me an email saying she was embarrassed of me. I took that news pretty hard. I mean, it was all in fun. To me, dressing up for the derby is way more important than dressing up for Halloween. I think I might have gotten a little hyper while at the derby but it's cause I love it so much.

Esmerelda and I had a nice talk on the way home, she had gotten very quiet during the derby. It might have been me being really loud. Or it might have been from me flirting a little too much with my friend's date Catcher. It's not that I didn't like Esmerelda. She is very pretty and very fun and super chill. It's just that Catcher is what I have dreamed about for years. From the moment I saw her, I couldn't take my eyes off her. I wasn't sure if Esmerelda noticed. Does that make me a sleazebag?

We were putting on fake tattoos in my parents' kitchen when Catcher first arrived. She immediately wanted to put on fake tattoos too. She found one that said Catcher and I suggested she place it on her chest. I know, kinda skeazy. Well, maybe not. I just felt like there was so much chemistry between Catcher and I and it felt natural. We joked around at the derby too, she was sitting behind me and at one point I touched her leg and she was like "oh, that feels nice" and I seriously almost went insane. Another time, she asked if I was going to kiss Esmerelda and I almost wanted to yell at her "No, I want to kiss you!" When we got back to my parents' house, she wanted to jump on the tramp so I found her a pair of shorts and we went out to the tramp. It was great. I was giddy just being around her. She also wanted to see our pigs. She talked about how she wanted her kids to raise animals to learn work habits. It was so great. I told her about Mooner and she thought that was awesome. She added me as a friend on facebook.

On Saturday, I was at the furniture store looking for a sectional when I met BFD. She was working there and we flirted. She offered to come hang out with us and gave me her card with her cell number written on the back. I am thinking I will call her today and take her on a date this week.

Other Notes: On Sunday, we had a bunch of people over to play games and there was this girl there Faline that I felt a bit of a connection to. She wasnt as friendly as some of the other girls but she was pretty cute and I may ask her out on a date.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Nice to know you.... Goodbye!

Ariel and I went to Incubus last night. I like some Incubus songs but I have never really cared that much about them. Such was the concert. I sang along to some of the songs, the ones I knew. I kinda wished they would have played the song "I miss you" cause it is my favorite of theirs but they didn't. Once we got there, we met up with Ariels' friend Jen and a couple other guys and girls. They were all drinking and living it up. Within two minutes of meeting up with them, they offered Ariel a taste of their beer and she accepted it with no hesitation. It made me really uncomfortable. I have been around plenty of people drinking, including plenty of really good friends. But it just made everything so awkward. Such was the night.

After the concert, we drove back to Ariel's car. She then decided to tell me that she didn't think she should go to the Demolition Derby with me. She said she liked me but she was just so emotionally unavailable right now and she didn't want to lead me on. It hurt. I mean, I expected it but that doesn't mean I wanted it to happen. I guess our lifestyles are just not really compatible anyway. I am struggling to build my testimony and she seems fairly content to let hers' drown.

Side notes: An ex-girlfriend called me last night to talk during the concert. She has been married for several years but I think she is struggling with it and missing me. I told her to stay with her husband. A friend of mine from a different ward a few years ago has been telling me lately that she wants to settle down with me. She is an attractive little Russian girl that is kind of a gold-digger. If I were to hook up with her, she would certainly bleed me dry. She says she will get her life straightened out and marry me in the temple, as long as it's the San Diego Temple.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Time and Time again

Studied last night with Ariel. I love helping her learn something. It makes me feel good. While driving her home, I apparently didn't properly use my signals, so I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. He asked if I had been drinking. Luckily, I hadn't (cause I don't drink!) and so he let me go with a warning that I need to use my turning signals properly.

At Ariel's house, we sat on the porch and talked. Although I think we bonded quite a bit (she said I was the coolest guy she knows), she also told me that she didn't really think she was ready to settle down. It wasn't like I asked her. It was more like we just talked about it. Kind of the DTR (Define the Relationship) that never was. It's too bad cause I like her. I gave her a kiss on the side of her forehead and then left. What else am I supposed to do? Wait around forever in the hopes that she will change her wild ways and choose life with me? Should I just walk away? My brother said the other night "I have been told of a certain sea snake which has a very unusual method of attracting its prey. It will lie at the bottom of the ocean as if wounded. Then its enemies will approach, and yet it will lie quite still. And then its enemies will take little bites of it, and yet it remains still."

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

The tension and the terror

I studied last night with Ariel for the third time. The thing about study dates is that you are really toeing the friendship line. There isn't a lot of physical contact. Like, I can't very well hold her hand during studying or on the walk to the car after. I can't kiss her at the end. How would that be? "When was your first kiss?" "Well, he helped me learn the edocrine hormones and then quizzed me about the hypothalamus and then just came in and kissed me." So, even though I get to spend plenty of time with her, I feel like I am losing the battle right now.

Texts from Ariel:

"I know your fun . I promise i'm not boring either. Night."
"I'm checking on when i can hold please :-). Thank for the two texts can you send them again...? You're amazing."
"Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!"
"Can not. Thank you. So did you."
"Yes huh. I will like you more for helping me."

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Chaiwalah! Well ladies and gentlemen, Jamal Malik, garma garam chai dene walah from Mumbai, lets play Who Wants To Be A Millionaire

Ariel came over last night to watch Slumdog Millionaire. I hadn't rented it yet so we started to drive over to the redbox when I had a brilliant idea. Why not take my brother's motorcycle? Of course, I don't have a license and I am not a great driver but we flipped around, grabbed the bike, and headed. It was such a good idea cause it kinda broke the ice for physical touch between us. I may just buy a motorcycle simply to take girls on a short ride at the beginning of a date.

We started watching the movie, which by the way I absolutely love, and we were sitting pretty close together. Thing about Ariel, she is very playful. Like, if I elbow her or something, she will elbow me back. So we kept bumping each other, which was so great. We eneded up cuddling and holding hands. It was fantastic. At one point, we were wrestling a bit and I thought "I can make out with this girl right now" and I didn't. How's that for self control? Anyway, we seemed very comfortable together last night. She texted me this morning asking if I was going to the Incubus concert. Maybe she is more interested in me than I thought.