Tuesday, November 23, 2010


Last week, I met Dee and Dum for dinner. They are such a strange couple. If I text one too much, the other one will get mad at me. At this point, I am pretty sure that Dee likes me more than Dum does. Dee randomly texted me on Sunday night and asked if I was attracted to Dum. I waffled a bit and then said yes and she said she figured that was the case and it was to settle an argument. It kinda felt like unnecessary drama to me.

On Sunday, I invited House over for dinner. I made pork chops (since I have my pig skittles in the freezer), rice a roni and brownies. I don't know if House liked any of the food but at least she pretended to. Then I played my guitar for her. I think House was impressed but she is so nice that she probably would have said it sounded great even if it sounded awful. We watched Groundhog Day with Milo and RunsWithScissors. Then we watched House's new commercial. Yeah, that's right, House filmed a commercial last week. Both Milo and RunsWithScissors couldn't stop complimenting House for how hot she looked in the commercial. After House left, Milo and RunsWithScissors and Steve-O all told me that I need to marry House. I can just add them to the list.

Tonight I am meeting Lebron for dinner. Lebron is a girl I met online. This is our first date. It should just be a short dinner to minimize the awkwardness. I wonder if I should get my haircut before I go...

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Style Points

I haven't made any huge life decisions about cars or dogs yet. I have been thinking about cars a lot lately today and odds are I am going to keep the same car that I have. When I bought it, I thought that girls were going to go crazy over it (or at the very least, give me style points for it) but I was wrong. It's really just a way to get from point A to point B.

As for the dog, Milo kept reminding me of how large the feces would be for a large dog. He thinks I should get a much smaller dog. Then again, he doesn't think I should get a dog at all. I work a lot and I mostly worry about a dog having social issues because no one is around the house. Even with the four of us living there, the house is unoccupied more than 50% of the time. I certainly don't want to become like my grandparents (they each base their entire schedule around their dumb dogs - it's an excuse to leave early for everything "Gotta go take care of the dog." I wanna just scream "It's only a stupid dog, it's not as important as this event." But I don't.).

Last week at church, I met two new girls Tweedledee (Dee) and Tweedledum (Dum). They are these two besties forever crazy girls. We went bowling on Friday night. I made a bet with Dee that the loser of bowling had to run naked around the outside of my house later that night. She lost. We decided to blow up pumpkins at my house using dry ice bombs. So I ran by the store and bought some dry ice. It was a disaster. 1 in the morning in my residential neighborhood and we are outside trying to blow up pumpkins. Only on the third attempt did we have any success (a loud boom much like the shot from a gun - the pumpkin still didn't blow up). We ran back inside and I started realizing how dumb the whole thing was. If the cops showed up, I would be the one to take the blame because a) I own the home, b) I won't lie to the cops and c) I instigated the whole thing. KJo and my new friend Rogen were there too. They saw my vulnerability and started pretending like the cops were outside snooping around. I was so nervous. Of course it was all just a joke (thankfully) but I had nightmares that night about it.

The next day, Milo and Dee and Dum and I went to the soccer game. It was kind of a date but it was obvious early on that Milo did not approve of Dee or Dum. A direct quote from Milo "These girls aren't cute enough for you." He acted sick and I ended up with the two girls watching a movie. They both seem interested in me, but in a weird kind of way. It's just asking for trouble to hang out with these two girls. For instance, on Monday I texted Dum a few times and then she told Dee that I had been texting her (and not Dum) all day and so Dum was pissed at me. Instant drama, just add water. I had a bit of interest in Dum up until that point. Now I have zero interest in dating either of them.

The online dating thing has produced a few prospects. There was one girl that I had even set up a date with. She had one picture that was very cute. Then she posted about 5 more pictures and she wasn't as cute in any of them. Now I kind of feel a bit committed. I have to keep reminding myself that dating is not charity. Nobody is entitled to a chance. Still, I feel really bad canceling on her now. Overall, online dating has been less effective.

I still talk to MrShit regularly. She is coming back to the USA in January. I still talk to House all the time too. We went on a date last week. There just isn't much to report there.