Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Non-date dating

I go on a fair amount of non-date dates. In a non-date date, it's almost like a date except without the romantic interest. In other words, a non-date date is hanging out with a friend that is a girl where everything else sort of moves like a date. Such non-date dates include hanging out with BFF, hanging out with Lorelei, and last night's hangout with KJo. KJo and I met in law school and became fast friends, although I can tell at times that she must restrain herself from criticizing my haphazard life. It's only natural, KJo is a grounded girl that is very conservative while I am not. I tend to be too spontaneous and headstrong. But that doesn't stop us from being friends. I should mention that none of the girls I go on non-date dates with would consider them dates. The dates typically include the three P's of dating as instructed by mormon church leaders: Paired off, Planned for, and Paid for. However, they never include the less mentioned fourth P: Put out.

It's just me hanging out with a good friend doing something fun. A lot of the time, it just makes sense for me to pay, since I am the one who initiated whatever hairbrained scheme activity that we are participating in. I hope my non-date dating friends aren't upset if I write about some of my adventures with them.

Last night, KJo and I went to TJ-Maxx. TJ-Maxx is like the lower middle class version of the DI (which is like a low class version of a department store). They sell underwear, perfume, rugs, dishes, chocolate, lamps, etc. It's basically all stuff that didn't sell at some other store and is now greatly discounted. One time, I found a zebra skin dog pillow, a cheetah skin dog pillow and a giraffe skin dog pillow there. I purchased all three, even though I own no dogs.

While walking out of TJ-Maxx, KJo and I saw a flier on the ground for an open house at Dream Dinners. Neither of us knew exactly what Dream Dinners even did, so we ventured in to have a look see. The place was hilarious. Basically, you show up, they have all the groceries purchased, you cut stuff up to prepare these meals, freeze them, and then cook them at home. You can also pay an additional $25 to have them do all that work for you. I ended up spending $250. The idea is that these meals are healthy, tasty and easy to cook. I could almost see KJo's eyes rolling as I signed up for this service. KJo is an excellent cook and just finds my inabilities rather humorous. So, in the future, look for me to be cooking some fabulous meals for friends, family members, roommates and perhaps even dates.

Honestly though, I think cooking dinner for a date is a bad idea. It's like being the nice guy. Girls would swear up and down that they want a nice guy but the truth of the matter is, girls have NO IDEA what they want! Why? It's probably the same reason I am really attracted to slutty girls. Evolution dictates that slutty girls are the most likely candidate for a guy to mate with. Evolution also dictates that douche bag guys are the most likely candidate for a girl to mate with.


  1. I love the fourth P!

    xoxo Lorelei

  2. Did you pick up your meals? Have you tried them?