Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Is it for me?

So one of my friends Foot was doing her visiting teaching. Good mormon girl type activity. Now, I am not sure how it came up but she starts telling the girl she is visiting teaching about my date with SouthernBelle. Sometime along the way, the girl she is visiting teaching stops her and says "I went on that date! I am SouthernBelle." Yeah, pretty embarrassing. She didn't see the blog but I am sure that my level of dorkiness in her book went way up. I mean, what guy blogs about his dates? I had serious thoughts of ending A Date with Tripp Hazard because of this incident. Foot also informed me that SouthernBelle thinks I am kinda old. Now that really hurt my feelings. Anyone who has met me knows that I have a young spirit. I neither look nor act my age. I called SouthernBelle on it and she said that she hates gossip and that it wasn't what she said. Who knows?

On Sunday at ward prayer, I hardly said a word to SouthernBelle. The whole activity was literally crawling with 19 year old girls. I talked to two different girls for most of the time. Both were 19. Then I met MathCheerCoach. MathCheerCoach is a math teacher at a local high school. She also is the cheer coach. We talked a little but she didn't seem that interested in talking with me. Plus, she doesn't want to stay here. She wants to move someplace warm. That's great, except my house, my career, my family and my life are here. So it's two strikes against her already.

SouthernBelle and I agreed to go out this Saturday but she texted me last night and had to cancel. I am sort of up a river without a paddle right now. My first thought was to call TheWriter. She and I met online but haven't met yet. Thing is, I have seen lots of pictures of her (there are almost 1000 on facebook) and I am only attracted to her in about 10% of those. I know, what a weird number. TheWriter is goofy and fun and outgoing, but if I am not attracted to her, I certainly won't start dating her. My next thought was Aussie. I messaged her on facebook but she said her parents were in town and she had to spend time with them. I am still considering other girls, including MathCheerCoach, Virginia, and TheFlake. Virginia is a girl I have never met that added me as a friend on facebook. We have several mutual friends. Looking at her pictures, I am very attracted to her. TheFlake is a girl I have had a crush on in the past. She works at a dry cleaning place and is quite flaky. But gorgeous and spunky and fun and cute and just so attractive.

Last night I went and hung out with FormerLesbian. I found it a bit disturbing. First, I met her mother. Overweight but nice. Second, I found out FormerLesbian has lost 80 pounds. She used to weigh 225. Now, that's great that she lost all of that weight but I still see that as a negative. Finally, FormerLesbian acts like she is in love with me already. I may be handsome and charming, but I am not THAT handsome or THAT charming. So it makes me awfully suspicious when a girl starts having feelings for me that early on that are that strong. Plus, when I feel lukewarm and they come on strong, it's definitely a turnoff.


  1. I am actually speechless. WOW is all I can say.

  2. I stumbled across your blog and I've been reading some of your posts -- I seriously cannot believe that there are actually men in the world who think and behave the way you do. You seem to think you're so hot because you're a lawyer with a bunch of money, but if that's all you've got going for you, the girls you attract are going to be just as shallow as you and you're going to be miserable. Money and beauty don't create happiness -- especially if it's the only thing you value. I can't think of a better phrase to describe you than "disgusting sleazebag." Seriously, wake up. Women aren't objects for you to play with and just discard. How would you feel if some sleaze treats your daughters the way you treat the girls YOU date? If you keep this up, I hope you get what you deserve: either a miserable marriage or that you die a lonely, fat, virgin. Seriously. Get it together and stop inflicting yourself on these poor women. You're spreading way too much negative karma here, dude. Just wait -- it'll come back to you.

    Oh also, you must not be all you claim to be as far as looks and youthfulness and charm are concerned ... because if you were, you wouldn't get rejected by every single prospect you have. Pathetic.

  3. Jessica, calm down, because I'm pretty sure that this is a parody website. I'd like to believe that no one is actually this big of a douche bag and I wouldn't be surprised if the writer were actually a woman.

    We've all been in wards with a guy like this-the creepy 29 or 30- year-old who is constantly preying on young girls. They always give him a chance, even if he is a fugly loser, because of his potential earning power. All the girls make fun of him behind his back and talk about how creepy he is. As soon as they realize what he is like (see Southern Belle)-they realize that no amount of money is worth being with him.

    I'm thinking of doing a shout out to this blog in my blog, because these idiots are so pervasive in Mormon culture and I think that people would get a kick out of it.

  4. Really girls? You really have nothing better to do with your time than demean a complete stranger's blog? Are you really that bitter towards men? I'm beginning to feel like Amy Poehler on the Weekend Update because I really just can't believe that anyone would be so mean to someone she doesn't even know.

    I happen to know Tripp and he's definitely not a "disgusting sleazebag" or a "douche bag." He's not old or creepy or pathetic. By normal standards, a lot of men don't even consider getting in a serious marriage-worthy relationship until they're in their early 30s. Just because we happen to be LDS doesn't mean that we have to be married by the age of 22 and then divorced by 23 to be considered "normal."

    And before you say things like that about a guy you don't know, think a minute about what the single guys are saying about you ladies. Late-20s, LDS, not married...what labels do you think are arbitrarily thrown on you? Unattractive? Socially awkward? Ugly? Nerdy? Brutish? Power hungry? A 4? Stalkerish? Crazy psycho b* (as my ex-boyfriend likes to call it)?

    So next time you feel the sudden urge to bring down a total stranger, maybe think a little before you open your big mouth.

    xoxo Lorelei

  5. Lorelei, as I mentioned, I was sincerely under the assumption that this was a spoof that was making fun of stereotypes. I thought that the intent was comedy, and I'm sorry to realize that it isn't. Your rebuttal isn't really reflective of anything that I wrote because:

    1. I didn't think that it was a real person writing.
    2. I don't hate men and I'm not bitter
    3. I never said that people should be married by a certain date, I just think that trolling for teens is kind of creepy and I reiterate, I thought that this was fake. The right time to get married is different for everyone.
    4. If people don't want comments, they shouldn't have a comments section. I don't consider people who leave comments on my blog as "people who don't have anything better to do."

    I'm sure that you are a really nice girl and it is good that you want to defend your friend and I'm sorry to have hurt his feelings. He could probably stand to reevaluate his attitudes towards women, but maybe his tone comes across differently if you actually know him.

    I also think that there are tons of people who reinforce stereotypes about older single women, so the stereotypes don't really bother me.

  6. I also stumbled upon Tripp's blog a few months ago, and as I started to read I thought wow this is funny a guy who writes about the girls he dates... this is entertaining well imagine my surprise as I skip to another blog entry and I realize I am one of the girls he is writing about. No not SouthernBelle that he talks about discovering the blog, I am a different girl from the past.
    At first i was furious because who is he to tell the WORLD about everything that was said and done on our date.. it's one thing to talk to all your friends, but the internet happens to be a very public tool no matter how private you think it to be. Not only that but he is only telling one side of the story, his perspective of the night... Yes our date was fun, and I enjoyed myself but goodness you didn't have to refrein from holding my hand or kissing me... my arms were folded the whole night and I never gave you an opportunity to kiss me. And I'm guessing a good 50% or so of the other girls you said that about were probably the same.
    I never commented back when all this happened because by the time I found this blog I was already on the former dated list and really didn't care anymore but I did keep following... It's kind of funny to listen to you repeatedly meet girls, get rejected, or reject them; but after Jessica, Jill, and Lorelei's comments I can't keep my mouth shut any more. Jessica and Jill were maybe a little harsh, your not a sleazebag, or a douche... But you have become desperate in your attempts to find "the one" your endless dating cycle is ridiculous. Going on a date every day of the week for the last 8 years hasn't gotten you anywhere, why don't you chill out. And you do expect way to much of girls, we have flaws just like I know you do so lighten up. Just because she's not the perfect size, personality type, or age you drop the gavel on her head! BACK OFF! Every girl that goes out with you is noticing your faults just like you... Which is why you've been on hundreds of first dates but probably only a few second dates...
    But I think my very favorite entry has to be this last one where you talk about formerlezbian falling for you so quick and how it's scaring you, I got a real kick out of that one because that is exactly what you do! It only took one date for me to feel the need to tell you I only wanted to be friends because I was worried you were getting the wrong impression!
    Tripp you not a bad guy, your a really nice guy who comes on a little strong but the biggest thing is that every girl can tell that you are desperate and trying really hard.. Don't tell us how amazing you are show us... and don't expect the girls you go out with to be perfect, give them room to breath... stop expecting so much, don't lower your standards but stop expecting girls to fit into the mold you have made for them.
    Maybe if you started focusing on making yourself the type of person you would want to marry, the right girl for you will come along.. Tripp take yourself on a date... was it fun? would you want to take yourself on a second date? start thinking about life that way and maybe it will happen for you...
    and by the way don't stop writing your blog because of these entries, your a rather entertaining storyteller.