Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Older girls versus younger girls

On Friday night, Cowboy and I did some volunteer stuff for the American Cancer Society. Just in case anyone was wondering, I am against it (cancer, that is). There were about 5 guys and 7 girls there. It actually was extremely conducive to meeting people. I had a good conversation with a girl that had gone to two years of law school and then dropped out and another conversation with a girl that had "Faith" tattooed on her wrist but was embarrassed about it. These girls were a bit older (probably their early to mid 30s) but they were super chill. I think all of them were Mormon but they weren't crazy Mormon. I think being Mormon is kinda like being a parent. Your first kid is way overprotected. You have tons of rules set up for them and if they don't follow the rules to a T, then they get punished. At least this was how my parents raised us. However, over time, you seem to chill out a little. My parents stopped freaking out if one of their kids was a few minutes late past curfew. And the curfew was moved from midnight to 1 or even 2. Of course, there are downsides to this. Littlelittlebrother speaks to/about my parents in ways that would have never been acceptable when I was his age. I think this is more because of his personality than because of my parents' more relaxed parenting style. Anyway, so people who have been Mormon a while can sometimes get that it isn't easy and they don't come off quite as judgmental early on. Thats how I felt with these girls. It was really fun.

On Saturday, BFF and I went to a theme park with BFF's cousin and her cousin's husband. There were tons of early teenagers walking around in love. How come it is so much easier for them to find love at that age than it is for me at this age? Most of the guys just look like total freaks. They have piercings in their faces. They are wearing girl's pants. And yet they have a fairly attractive girlfriend. Do the girls just have lower standards at that age?


  1. i havent read this post yet, but i just want to say, i might kick your a** :D
    thats just an old girl talking.

  2. whew! what a lesson learned for me-dont jump to conclusions and dont assume. sigh. sorry. i know, i get a little senstive.
    yes. girls do have lower standards at that age, but their needs are minimal. all they want is someone to pay attention to them and hold their hand at the amusement park so they look grown up and cool. they dont talk about the future. well, they might, but i am not talking prom or if they what they will do over the summer. i am talking roth ira's and what to do if your son comes out of the closet. the bar is so very low.

  3. hahaha oh lovey dovey teenagers! Making everyone else (or maybe just me) feel extra alone.

    I definitely think standards change as you get older but I am still a youngin so what do I know! Having someone pay attention to me and hold my hand at the amusement park sounds pretty nice but long term is kinda important-ish too

  4. the hand holding stuff is definitely important-even to an "old" girl like myself! just a bunch of other stuff has to go with it, the hand holding isnt enough.

  5. I am 6 years older than my fiance and it is really great. Our age difference hasn't made a difference in our relationshiop besides the fact that he is still in school. I think people limit their scope too much and should be open to relationships where the woman is older than the man.

    And I dont think it is that older women have lower standards, I think they are just less uptight. They have simply had more life experience. As you get older you realize you are only human and you gain some humility. I think that can enable a person to treat others with more dignity and compassion. aka be nicer to be around

  6. Gotta dock you points on this one. "Most of the guys just look like total freaks. They have piercings in their faces. They are wearing girl's pants. And yet they have a fairly attractive girlfriend. Do the girls just have lower standards at that age?" Pretty immature and judgmental of you. I just find it funny: you hang out with me in real life, and I've had piercings, have tattoos, and I wear boys clothes all the time. You know better than to judge so shallowly. It's too true in life that just because you're unattractive or different doesn't mean you don't deserve to be happy, and just because you're attractive and successful doesn't mean you deserve happiness.

    I know you well, and I know you're a smart boy, and you'll figure it out. But if you want a sweet compassionate girl, passing shallow judgment (whether or not it's blatant) will inevitably turn her away from you.

    Always here to be the Adversary,

  7. Dear Skin.Head.Sheena:

    I think you misread my post. I wasn't trying to talk down about people with facial piercings, tattoos or transgender clothing choices. I wasn't implying that these guys were unattractive or undeserving of happiness nor was I implying that I am attractive or successful. What I was saying is that the way you carry yourself says a lot about you. I love you to death Skin.Head.Sheena and I still think someday I am gonna marry you but you know as well as I do that those things represent a counterculture. A group of people that says "F you!" to the norm. And I am ok with that. It's just that I saw lots of these guys with attractive normal looking girls. When it comes to being wild and carefree and fun, I can't compete against those kinds of guys. I guess I just didn't realize that I had to compete with that kind of guy.

    I guess what I was really trying to convey is my frustration that I spent as much time as I did trying to become something (a lawyer) only to have it be completely out of vogue. If the secret to happiness is really rock music and social rebellion, I am screwed. I just didn't expect to be where I am feeling jealousy towards guys like that. I didn't mean it to come across as shallow and I apologize for that. Thanks for being the Adversary.

    Love Tripp

  8. You're always welcome. Those types of boys can be visually startling yes, but, just don't call them total freaks. Its too ... simply put for such a diverse culture of people.

    We can start planning our wedding now.
    Love you!