Monday, October 3, 2011

What have I learned?

In response to aLifeInBloom's suggestion (a cute redhead in a relationship that I have never met), I am going to try and write about how I have changed in the past year. For simplicity, I will write it as a numbered list.
1. Less chaotic dating. I think in the last year, I realized how awful it can be to go on four dates a week consistently. I think I mostly just liked the attention. Lately, I have been going on less dates with less girls. It makes for a boring blog. But it means I am not constantly trying to juggle dates with four or five girls at a time.
2. Less money. I have made a conscious decision to spend less money on my dates. Yeah I took Popcorn to a traveling broadway musical, which wasn't cheap, but in general I have decided to spend less on my dates. This past week I had tickets to a Taylor Swift concert. Rather than take a girl I wasn't that into, I sold them for a tidy profit.
3. I feel less like marriage is just around the corner for me. I used to think it was just going to fall in my lap soon enough. Now, I have serious doubts about whether I will be married anytime soon. It means I am thinking of my life more in terms of being single rather than "I can't buy that cause it won't make sense once I get married."

I was hoping that I could write a really decent list of ways that I have changed in the last year. But I don't think I have changed that much. So instead, here is a list of things that I could/should change to become more dateable:
1. Be less shy. I ask plenty of girls out. But they are often setups or girls that I know that I am not that interested in. The girls that I meet or see and really want to date intimidate me so I am less likely to talk to them or ask them out.
2. Worry less about marriage. When I am not thinking "where is this going?" I tend to have lots more fun on dates. Problem is, how do I stop thinking like that? How can I be "fun Tripp Hazard" rather than "date Tripp Hazard" on a more regular basis while on dates?
3. Make more of an effort to go to social activities where I might meet people. This one is harder. The mormon party scene drives me crazy. I never meet anyone at those parties and leave feeling angry. Bars aren't much better. Should I go back to school? Take cooking classes? Join a yoga group? I need a better way to meet girls.
4. Get rid of my mullet. Yeah, I said it. I love it because it makes me feel like a rebel. And it gives me this excuse like "these girls just aren't interested in me because I have a mullet."
5. Dress better. I have tons of out of style clothes. And lots of in style work clothes. But hardly any in-style casual clothes.
6. Do what I love. They say it's easier to meet someone if you are just doing what you love. I don't really know exactly what that means. I guess I need to get some hobbies that will help me meet girls.

Last week, I had a second date with Popcorn. It was fun but short. I can't tell right now if this thing with her is going anywhere or if we are on the fast track for friendship. We just went out for dinner and then talked in the car while listening to music.


  1. Ah, reading this blog just made my really awful Monday a little bit better.

    You already know my theory about the mullet as a litmus test. I say, keep it. :)

  2. I think you should combine number 3 and number 6 of your 'should' list. Find something you love to do and start dedicating your time to it, the social/dating side will follow. And if you want to marry your best friend, then meeting someone with similar interests is key.
    This past year I've fallen in love with completing triathlons and my social life has become training and traveling to races with those people I train with and obviously share the same interest/passion I do. As the year has gone on, I'm more and more clear that I want to date someone that also likes to road bike, or hike, or swim because that's what I spend most of my time doing.

  3. I say you stop trying to find the right girl and let her find you while you enjoy life and a fun hobby. My cousin actually did take up cooking classes and got a job at a restaurant and then found her hubby.

  4. You definitely should find a few hobbies like listed above. Doing something you love without worrying about meeting someone and getting married is when you will actually find someone. I don't think you are going to find someone at all of your stupid parties. I really think you are going to find someone either volunteering or while doing something you are passionate about. If that doesn't work then go to nursing school. There are lots and lots of girls. Get rid of the mullet. It was funny for a time, but that time is gone. Now it is just gross. Go shopping for some new clothes. You have a lot of shirts that seem too short so get rid of them and buy some new ones. You have awesome work clothes so you really should try to have nice clothes out of work too.