Men and mistresses

My date on Friday night with SG was about what you might expect. A little awkwardness, conversations about some really strange topics, and watching a couple of really crappy horror movies. SG and I don't really click at all. Thank heavens for that. She is quite the strange girl. It was a fun night, don't get me wrong, but I am not at all interested in her.

On Saturday, House and I went to a concert. It was an outdoor concert and so we just chilled on a blanket on the grass while people around us drank wine. We stopped at 7-11 after the concert and got donuts and chocolate milk. Do you ever think about why men have mistresses? I watched The Other Boleyn Girl on Sunday by myself and the king had a wife that he loved but he kept finding a mistress. I know some of it was because he was searching for a male heir. But, I also wonder if maybe a wife can never really fulfill both roles. Maybe you can't have both an intellectually satisfying connection with the same person that you have a sexual connection. Of course you initially are sexually attracted to the girl you marry. But maybe everything becomes utilitarian once you have kids. She cares for them more than she cares for you. Once a woman is a mother, her role as wife is diminished. I am not trying to place all the blame on women for men cheating but I wonder if maybe men are taking too much of the blame.

I talked with my friend Hobbes last night about his divorce. He told me how crazy I am for wanting to get married. Basically, getting married was the single worst decision he had made in his life. Is it just society pressuring me to find someone and get married or does it begin internally? I don't have an answer. My parents are absolutely disappointed in me for not being married. It's not the first time they have been disappointed in me. Every one of my friends from high school is married. I think that sort of thing is naturally going to have an influence on me. Three of my closest friends from law school (girls) are getting married in the next month.

Bullied by the world around me.

This weekend I have a date with SG and a date with House. I know what you are saying, "Tripp, are you crazy? Why are you going out with SG?" Well, I just thought it would make for an interesting story. I kinda feel a bit low on interesting stories right now. House came over the other night and we watched band of brothers. We talked and it was just great. I think the world of her but I am just not finding myself falling in love with her. According to my dad and one of my coworkers, that should be no excuse. I should just marry her anyway. Marriage is less about love and more about mutual respect and partnership. In 7 years, the whole looks thing won't matter anyway. Phooooey.

I don't want to live that life. I refuse to live that life. In the words of Taylor Swift (yeah, I listen to Taylor Swift, what's it to you?)

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
and it's 2 am and I'm cursing your name
you're so in love that you act insane
and that's the way I loved you
breaking down and coming undone
it's a roller coaster kinda rush
and I never knew I could feel that much
and that's the way I loved you.

Maybe I am just writing this because I might be starting to cave a little. I might have been thinking "sure, I can marry someone that I am not in love with. It would make my life much easier. We could talk and have lots of fun and when it came to lovemaking, I could just go with it, I guess." It just adds to the problem of me feeling bullied by the world around me.

Conversations with future strippers

House came over for Band of Brothers last Wednesday night. Nothing eventful. I enjoy all of the time I spend with her. On Thursday, Pot and I went to dinner. It was fun. Pot is older than me by a few years and is divorced. We went for Indian food and then dipped ice cream cones. It was a short date cause Pot is super busy right now but it was fun. The conversation went well and Pot seems like a super chill girl. I am excited to take her out again. Probably sometime next week, since she is out of town for most of this week.

On Saturday night, Milo and I met up with a couple of other guys for sushi before heading to a bar. I always feel a little awkward at bars cause I don't drink but it seemed like fun. We ended up at the same bar that I met Jasmine at a year ago. I ended up in a strange conversation with a girl that I will call StripperGirl (or SG for short) about whether stripping is degrading to women. SG wants to be a stripper and plans to make a ton of money and then retire and live the great life when she is my age. I just wasn't so convinced that it was such a great idea. But it made for a great conversation. SG definitely enjoyed talking to me and as the night went on, SG informed me that she was probably going to sleep with me that night. I hated to burst her bubble but it needed to be done. I hate using the excuse of "I am Mormon" cause it implies that I don't really think for myself and that the only reason I wasn't going to sleep with SG was because of religion. So I explained to SG that I wanted to wait for marriage and such. It was an interesting conversation, one that many mormon girls can probably relate to but not one that many guys have experienced. I was trying to explain my values to a drunk girl intent on sleeping with me.

Eventually, SG got offended that I wouldn't sleep with her. She said I was a tease. There really isn't a good response to that. I went to the bar because I wanted to have an interesting discussion with someone but to the average person, I guess going to bar is all about hooking up. Due to some weird circumstances, I ended up giving SG and her friends a ride home. I guess I should take the whole thing as a compliment.

On Sunday, I texted back and forth with McSwanson. I met McSwanson with littlebrother and Sugarloaf at a party celebrating the 4th of July. McSwanson is divorced with a kid but very spunky and friendly. I think she might have given her number out to four or five guys that night (including littlebrother) but she has potential. I might try and take her out this week. But McSwanson seems a little too playful to take seriously. Like that maybe she isn't taking dating seriously at all right now.